Feeling lonely, jealous or a burden to those around you?

September 8, 2017


Transformation isn’t just about figuring out a new way to relate to yourself…

It also involves finding a new way of relating to those around you.

When I first began developing relationships & connections with other spiritual women I remember thinking…

They are all so much more insightful than me!
So much more intuitive.

I felt like the apprentice.
Not wanting to say the wrong thing.
Not wanting to let on that I really didn’t belong here.

And yet so drawn to know these women deeper.
So mesmerized by the magnetic resonance they embodied.

Eventually that apprentice phase passed.
nly to throw me into the next challenge….

I don’t want to be a burden to anyone.

As I cultivated my own insight & intuition, I began to find some really unstable, challenging and downright depressing parts of myself that I had no clue how to move through.

At times I felt like I was drowning.

And while there were people there to hold & support me….. When everything’s falling apart – constantly – can feel like you need the crutch of friendship & support 24/7.

It’s a lot to ask for.
You begin to feel like a burden.

What’s more, as empowered women shouldn’t we know how to move through this?

Shouldn’t we just be self-responsible and use our tools?

We’ve all experienced those moments where we felt like a burden, unsure where to turn for support, unsure if we can ask for help…

Eventually this phase also passed.
Where the instability felt – more stable.

Where I was able to trust the wild ebbs & flows of my feelings. And my inner skillset was sure enough to hold me through anything [thank the goddess].

But on the other side of that transformation.
When I had really arrived in MYSELF.

I found that the wisdom I had personally cultivated, was already everywhere.

With every life coach and modern priestess sharing the same message of ‘I am enough’ and ‘self-love’.

The challenge of seeing my own personal wisdom – won through the tears and years of commitment to self – already out in the world again challenged to my ability to connect with those around me.

I started to withdraw.
Not wanting to be influenced by anyone else.

Feeling triggered by the same women I wanted to be in deep sistership with.

Perhaps fearful that I would find their way was better or more powerful than ‘mine’.

Dancing in and out of connection with women.
Again and again.
Repeating the same fears.

Of not enough.
Of being a burden.
Of wanting to own something for myself.

And honestly I’m not 100% on the other side, yet….

Recently I began to notice the texture of some jealousy arising within my being.

As I scrolled through social media, the burn of envy towards another woman rose up within me.

I was surprised.
She actually was a dear friend.

Yet I couldn’t deny this emotion was here.

So I began exploring, as embodied women do. I let myself feel all the textures of this jealousy.  I let myself know in intimately. I surrendered to all its uncomfortable implications…

And I discovered that at its heart, was in fact loneliness.

Loneliness is something we ALL Feel at times.

It’s something we need to be talking about – so that we can feel empowered to navigate new ways of relating to those around us.

From where I stand it feels clear that…

  • Far too many women feel alone on their journey
  • Far too many women are stuck in isolation
  • The old ways of individually walking this path are taking too long, when collectively we have access to such power
  • Women (myself included) are awakening in droves, and the speed of our awakenings means we need access to more advanced, experts earlier so we can individually actualize
  • Our planet & communities need whole, sensually empowered & abundant women (now more than ever)

For me it’s clear that the more I give, the more I serve, the more connections I foster.

Within myself, and within our community, I’ve been thinking hard about how I can give & serve even more deeply. And I’ve got a few exciting possibilities I’m looking forward to sharing with you in the coming weeks #staytuned.

But for the moment – I’d love to hear from you.

Which phase might you be experiencing right now….
Feeling like an apprentice?
A burden?
The burn of jealousy?
Or something else?

Let me know in the comments section – I’d love to connect & get to know you more.

For those women who are interested in understanding how they can begin to practice the emotional embodiment I mentioned in this blog you can begin your journey with the Feminine Magnetism Map, a beautiful guide to the key ways your feminine energy works.

Download your guide here.

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6 Comments on “Feeling lonely, jealous or a burden to those around you?”

  1. This is just timely, Jenna. Im a work at home mom who just gave birth few weeks ago.
    While Im blissful and found love with my two wonderful kids, I just feel alone, even though I know there are soooo many women out there who have come before me, who had been through the same. It’s difficult to shout out and show vulnerability, especially when you’re so used to making it on your own.
    And it’s also tough to show this side to people around you, for fear that they may not understand your loneliness. Furthering that feeling of isolation.
    It’s impt to recognize the way I connect with friends, and to those acquaintances who can better understand. Sometimes those closest to you can feel like strangers when they dont walk the same path. And their love can be fully enjoyed with some shift in perspective.

    • Feeling you Joane – and what I can reflect back (and know) is that it takes a STRONG woman to be vulnerable. Because we have to hold oursleves in our vulnerability first, before anyone else can hold us it in. But just even posting this comment is a powerful act. And I know you are beautiful for it x

  2. Hi Jenna
    Thank you for your openness and honesty. It’s needed more than ever these days among women and men too.
    I have found that the women around me that I work with and encounter daily, are too negative and narrow minded as well as being highly judgmental and ill informed so I find it really hard to get close or want to spend time with them. So I’d rather be alone and a bit lonely at times. The women who are not like that are usually on drugs of some kind or into some other addictive crutches so it’s a huge turnoff for me when I’m just naturally high on life.
    Also, I find that there is a lot of ‘using’ going on in social media like people just friending you so they can use you to prop up their business ( which I find really dishonest and quite cruel. So I don’t know how to find genuine generous people anywhere…
    That’s my thoughts so hopefully not too negative but jyst my truth.
    Love your work and would love to kick back with a wine together some time

    • A wine sounds great Margarete! I can deeply resonate with what you write. With today’s world & people’s agendas most of our bull-shit-meters are set to HIGH [I know mine is] and it can be exhausting! It’s so beautiful to see the comments through this community & others which I KNOW exist for women like us. We deserve it 😉

  3. Hey lovely, thank u so much for sharing this vulnerable story of your development! I am just about to start a coaching certificate around love sex and relationship. I soooooo look forward to it! We are only women and i catch myself regularly comparing how much attention and likes their postings get compared to mine in the facebook group we are sharing… If they are “more or less” beautyful than i am… Ohhhh my god its hard work not to hate myself for that but instead being a loving mother for this inner child part who does that…. I am sooooo craving sisterhood and i am so greatful that we are only women! but deep down it scares me to be “less than” – less beautyful, less insightful, less sensual, less experienced, less capable of doing the work we all want to do! Even though i have already a lot of experience with hands on work like bodywork and massages i am only very little experienced in hands off work like coaching… I already love these women fiercly and feel that i want to be loved in return… I feqr that they think i am silly with what i write or share although i often get very good feedback… I feel that this all is deeeeply related to massive mobbing and being left out by the other girls in my class since early as kindergarten… This wound still is very deep it seems… My mother energised an amulet for me with the counter essence and i am wearing it since yesterday. Lets see what it does for me. And lets continue feel all the shitty feelings through so this wound can eventually finally heal and open myself for deep sisterhood! <3 much love to you!

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